Saturday, January 3, 2009

"Gaydar" How Many Have Fallen For A Gay Man?

The first time I heard the term "Gaydar" I nearly spit my water out. It came from a friend of mine named Stephen in Chicago who is gay. We would go out and bet that he would get the guy before I did. How did he know who was gay? I mean I see the fem walk and the fem hand movements...But some are really manly and well, it's hard to see with beer goggles on. I know there are hundreds of girls like me who have fallen for a gay man. Come on...Were all friends here. I have to say this is the ONLY way you can have fun with competition and boys without hurting someones feelings. When I was younger, we'd go out of with a group of girls and there would always be one gal who wanted to leave early because no one would talk to her or ask her to dance. I was like, is this all that's left for us, to hook up? Heck, if that's what made her happy I would have bought her a vibrator and a blow up doll for companionship. I have always loved hanging out with my gay friends because they are so "really" blunt and they are not afraid to tell it like it is. In the movie "Father of The Bride", do you remember Frannnk...? Every bride wants a Frannnk. Someone that tells them they look fabulous or look like dog poop. Now Frannk is a man, so why is it that he can say anything blunt and were ok? But if G-d forbid our boyfriend, fiance' or husband says anything truthful we freak on them? I really do think everyone needs to have a Frannk during their wedding or just involved in their life. I'm not saying find someone gay like a pet rock, I just think that someone that has been there done that...has a fresh perspective. Frannk had one! We all loved him! Martin Short played the part well. I was never one who waited for a guy to ask me anything. In fact, my belief was that we went out dancing to be with our friends. It was never a mission to find Mr. Right. Have you ever known a friend to be insistent that you find a guy the night you go out? It was like we're on a man hunt! I did this in college. Tried to find the hot looking Frat boys to hang with (we said mash). I never had any expectations during college because what can you really expect from a college student who doesn't work? He goes to school right? It's really after college when you start the hunt per say. I want to say one thing, I have dated some people who suddenly turned gay after we dated. So back then, I was like how could I do that? Can someone change a sexual preference after being in a bad relationship? Can it really happen? According to Stephen, he says my behaviour might make them run to China but not switch from Vagina! Stephen I wish you were here on the East coast! Now, how about being married to someone who says they are straight but later fall in love with a man/woman? Again, I think each person knows how they really feel inside. Sometimes they can harbor feelings for years to fit in. Sadly, you can't really hide this for too long. I had a friend who was married for 4 years and we all knew her husband was gay, but she was insistent that we were being cruel. I really think he wanted to be straight, but that just wasn't the case. They did divorce after 4 years and a year later, he was with another man. He never really "came out", he just stopped talking to our group and went about this on his own. I did bump into him a few years ago and he was still with the same guy he met 12 years ago. Now here's a question I have for all of you straight or not...Why do gay relationships last longer than straight ones? It seems to me like they have more substance and no judging. Anyone have a story to tell? You know how I love stories! I know this one is RIGHT out of the water...I'm dabbling rememeber?

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